Sometimes my fiancé J1 and I can have a good-old fashion barney.
Not often, but let’s say more regular than a solar eclipse.
I know – so crazy right? Here you were thinking I was one of those people with such a level of high emotional intelligence and a perfect relationship meaning I never have disagreements with my partner (I will assume you are either new to our blog and/or haven’t read this post, or this post, or this post )….
With us both being a little ‘strong-willed’ in our approach to life, sure makes for some interesting conversations now and then.
Sometimes these conversations end up making me not want to talk to him for a certain period of time. Basically for as long as I can possibly hold out. I’m really good at the silent treatment.
The problem is, after a reasonable amount of huffing and puffing, possibly crying if it’s a really crappy argument, feet stomping, or grumbling (or all of the above) and I need someone to turn to, someone to console me in my hurt, someone to give me a cuddle and say “It’s ok, it’s not a big deal”… I realise it’s him. It’s him I want to make me feel better.
I want to call him and say:
“OMG you won’t believe it! J1 has been such a jerkburger today! I hate fighting with him, but…. Blah blah blah….
I know right, he just has NO idea…. Can I have a cuddle/sympathy/some words of affirmation to help me feel better?”
This is the problem when your go-to person is the same person you’re arguing with. Sure, I have some great girlfriends that listen to my endless-drama with the patience of a patron saint…. And sure, they absolutely do make me feel better.
But it’s J1 that always seems to get me over the line when I’m feeling upset.
I guess that’s what happens when your guy is (warning: cringe, spew, sick) your best friend. That he has the capacity to make life feel ok when all you feel is crappy. And I guess that’s why he is going to be make such a great life partner (fyi wedding date set for Feb 2013!).
How about you? Do you turn to your partner when you find yourself in a cranky-arsed-stressed-out-state? Or do you find comfort in a good friend, sibling or parent?